None of us want to have behaviors that don’t serve us! Yet we’ve all still got some, right? What if it turns out it’s simply a part of us driving those choices and behaviors – not all of us?
“Guys, do you know what I would give to have just ONE day of COVID quarantine again?!” That’s exactly what I said to a bunch of parents on the sidelines of my younger daughter’s soccer practice last week. What I didn’t know was that my oldest daughter would be diagnosed with COVID the very next day. And her sister two days later.
I’ll bet certain experiences quickly take you far away from ease. In those moments, it’s like a different part of you takes over, convincing you there’s only one way to handle the situation and there’s no choice but for it to be difficult, right? But what if it turns out we CAN choose ease more often than we believe?
Meet Blossom. At first, I thought she was simply the newest member of our family. But less than 24 hours later, I was ready to give her back to the shelter. I know this sounds horrible. But it’s true. You see, I didn’t yet know all she would go on to teach me.
Have you ever noticed that the harder we work to control exactly how we want clarity to show up for us, the less room we leave for it to slip into our lives with ease and in any number of ways?
Have you ever kicked into a pre-guest cleaning frenzy? You know, the kind that has you disregarding how hungry, exhausted or sick you are just so you can get the house in order before your visitors arrive?
Something unexpected happened last week. I was snuggling in bed with my 6-year-old daughter, doing our nighttime routine: reading a book (which I got REALLY into!!), rubbing her back, and kissing her goodnight. In the middle of reading, we got into a silly conversation and started making up new words to songs on the radio like, 🎵 🎶 “I had a dream I was licking ice cream off the sidewalk on my day off…” 🎶 🎵
But you know what changed my experience with this? When I lowered the bar. Yup. I changed my expectations. The ONLY thing I asked myself to do was to notice what it FELT like in my body when I made the choice to stay downstairs when I REALLY wanted to be climbing into bed. And I only asked myself to notice this for micro-moments. That’s it.
The demands of self-care can so easily become one more expectation on your plate. And then you start to resent the acts of self-care altogether. Sounds familiar, right? And before you know it, your inner Judge Judy is criticizing you even more because you failed, yet again, to succeed in your self-care attempts. Ohhhhh, it’s such an exhausting cycle!
We’ve ALL got that inner Judge Judy who loves to yammer on in unsupportive and even downright mean ways inside our minds. And sometimes this voice becomes so routine that we stop noticing its presence and it simply runs in the background. But this doesn’t stop its words from impacting how we feel.
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